Why You Should Ditch New Year’s Resolutions in 2020
80% of New Year’s resolutions fail by the second week of February. I’ll admit, I don’t know how statistically correct this figure is, but based on my own personal experience with New Year’s resolutions (and those of my nearest and dearest), I’d say it’s pretty accurate.
We’re almost in the second week of the second month of the year, so if you’re one of the many who have set them, how are your resolutions going? No judgement of course if you’ve thrown in the towel, I’ve been there done (or not done) that.
So why are the majority of us so sucky at sticking to resolutions?
Well, firstly, let’s take a look at the definition of a New Year’s resolution. Essentially, it’s when a person resolves to continue ‘good’ practices, changed an undesired trait/behaviour or improve their life.
So a New Year’s resolution involves creating a goal to change something we believe or have been told is ‘undesirable’ or ‘flawed’ about ourselves. And that my friends, is the problem here. We are creating resolutions from a place of ‘lack’ and the belief that we are not worthy as we are.
Don’t me wrong, I am all about personal growth and self development. I am a Life Coach and that’s kind of my job – but you don’t need to fall into the trap of the ‘New Year, New You’ bullshit to create a meaningful and purposeful life.
One of the most common resolutions I see within my community is to do with weight loss and dieting behaviours.
This year I want to…
– lose x amount of weight
– join a gym
– start a new diet
– exercise more
– eat ‘better’
These are perfect examples of resolutions created from a place of lack as well as beliefs and stories about our body. If we lose weight, we’ll be more attractive, confident, successful, valued, worthy – find a significant other, find a new job, be happier, look good in clothes etc.
This is not to say that health-related resolutions are unattainable and should just be forgotten, but I encourage you to explore the reasons why you believe your life would be better if you lost weight. My friend Ashlee (aka The Body Image Therapist) wrote this awesome blog late last year about ‘what we really mean when we write ‘lose weight’ on our New Year’s resolutions list’ and I highly encourage you to take a look to help you explore further!
Back to ditching New Year's resolutions...
But, I hear you say, if we don’t set resolutions won’t we just get lazy and never work towards anything ever again? Not true!
How about instead of focusing on what we lack, want to change or how we can transform into a ‘New You’, let’s focus on who we already are and how we can create an empowered year.
Tips to help you ditch New Year’s resolutions in 2020
What are your strengths?
First of all, make a list of your strengths. What makes you, you. Your strengths are qualities that make you feel strong, happy and worthy. Your weight, your appearance, the food you eat, the movement or exercise you engage in does not define YOU. By exploring your strengths and understanding the amazingness you bring to this world and the people around you, you can begin to quieten that inner critic that tells you you aren’t good enough.
Explore your values
Our values are important – they give us purpose, passion and help us to make life decisions. If you’ve spent most of your life focused on your body, food, calorie counting etc, you’ve most likely distanced yourself from your core values – your deepest desires.
Once you put less importance on looking a certain way or being a certain weight, you can really being to focus on living a value-driven life and focus on what really matters to you. Connecting with your values gives you a sense that your hard work (aka living) is worth the effort. Let’s face it, dieting only makes us miserable – focusing on our bodies puts so much unnecessary pressure on us and consumes us with negative thoughts and feelings about ourselves. It’s time to get real about why we are in this world and it’s not to lose weight and look pretty.
Use your strengths and values to create an inspiring vision for the year ahead
Once you have created a list of your strengths and values, reflect on how you can incorporate them into your year ahead. You could create a vision board with images and/or words of your strengths to remind you of how wonderful you are.
Ask yourself how aligned you are currently feeling to your values. For example, if creativity is one of your top values, you could find a way to incorporate being creative more often. Again, you could also create a vision board to help you take inspired action towards leading a value driven life.
Need some support and guidance?
If you’re looking for a sustainable way to create goals (or a vision) for the year ahead that doesn’t focus on weight loss or changing your body, come join my Uncover You online workshop on 20th February.
In this workshop, you will gain the tools to help you…
+ explore and understand who YOU are outside of your body image and appearance
+ set goals or intentions that are purposeful and not coming from a place of ‘lack’
+ identify your true strengths and qualities
+ discover your values and how can you use these to Uncover You and your potential
I’d love to see you there!